


1.17: Pass/Fail

by JustLikeTheSong



Series: NYC Spin-Off 'Verse [20]
Category: Glee
Genre: F/F, F/M, Friendship, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-06
Updated: 2013-06-27
Packaged: 2017-12-14 03:31:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/832210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustLikeTheSong/pseuds/JustLikeTheSong
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(1) Tina visits New York for her audition to NYADA and finds herself mostly on her own, as her friends and boyfriend are occupied with their own impending evaluations.</p><p>(2) Rachel and Blaine nervously prepare for their final class evaluations for the end of their first year at NYADA.</p><p>(3) Santana auditions for the NYU Jazz Choir.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. So Darkness I Became

"Thanks, T," [Mike](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdb0t13Q4P1r4hiwoo1_500.png) said, taking the cup of tea [Tina](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m49dbhI0U21qeds6ko1_500.jpg) was holding out for him.  He barely looked up from his notes, a half-smile flitting across his face.  She didn't blame him; he was almost finished his first year at Julliard, and with final exams and evaluations around the corner, he was understandably stressed out and hyper-focused on school.  She knew what his parents, especially his dad, were like.  Anything below a 3.9 GPA was sure to cause issues.

She and Mike had come over to the loft where Rachel, Kurt, Blaine, and Santana lived for a study session.  What was supposed to be a fun, relaxed night had quickly become a high-tension pity party.

"Rachel," [Blaine](http://25.media.tumblr.com/3ab89828f42ab89e813fe7bce183c0fb/tumblr_mn8gz3bHIC1r4gxc3o2_500.jpg) said as Tina sat down next to him on the couch, looking up from his textbook, "we should practice our number for Delaney's class tomorrow."

"I can't," [Rachel](http://media.tumblr.com/cd7832366ff91030afe3d0cdbb9b2224/tumblr_inline_mg8hfq7LyI1qilqg8.png) told him, waving her hands dramatically as she pored through her own notes, "you know I have my evaluation for Ms. July's class early next week; I need to perfect my solo, so things don't end horribly like they did last semester."

Blaine leaned over Tina's lap.  "I've heard rumors that Carmen Thibideaux is sitting in on Delaney's evaluations Tuesday and Wednesday," he hissed.

Rachel whipped her head up to stare at him, eyes wide.  "I'll pencil you in for tomorrow afternoon, then," she said, grabbing her calendar off the coffee table, "2:20 to 3:55."

"Well, you're not rehearsing here," [Santana](http://celebrityphotos.sheknows.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/6Z1B396311.jpg) told them, crossing her arms, "I got dibs.  I need to work out my audition piece for the jazz club, not that those geeks shouldn't already be begging me to join them.  Once I figure out what I'm going to sing," she muttered, resuming her scrolling on her lap top.

Tina's own audition, the biggest audition of her life, was tomorrow.  She had rehearsed it over and over, trying not to freak out about it as much as Rachel and Blaine had about theirs last year.  It wasn't working very well; NYADA was a very good school and pretty exclusive; they'd already accepted two students from William McKinley High School in Lima, Ohio, and Tina tried not to think about it, but what if they were expecting something based on Blaine and Rachel and took one look at her, listened to those first eight bars, and laughed her off the stage?

Still, she felt like a pro at this point when it came to selecting audition pieces.  "Maybe I could help you-" 

"No one is practicing in the loft," [Kurt](http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mewkqvXFVY1qilqg8.png) said fiercely.

"Oh my God, are you still going on about your stupid Vogue review?" Santana snapped, jabbing at her computer keys in annoyance.  "Kurt, you have like a month before that happens; calm down."

"Yes, a month for everything to go wrong!  A month for me to screw up horribly at work, as if I haven't already made myself look like an idiot in front of Isabelle on numerous occasions over the past year - "

"Sweetie, you know she loves you," Blaine murmured distractedly, but Kurt barrelled on.

"- plus I swear I'm missing like, five sketches, but I can't remember which ones! And this one - this one is all wrong; this is a disaster!"

Tina looked over at Mike, expecting him to make his contribution to the ranting session, griping about how much work he had to do and how much stress he was under, and couldn't everyone turn down the volume just a little?  But then she noticed he was wearing ear plugs and smiled to herself.

The four residents went back to a simmer, re-focusing on their respective work.  Tina decided not to announce her exit for fear of provoking their wrath and simply got up and slipped outside onto the fire escape.

Ever since her parents had put her on the plane early that morning, she'd had butterflies in her belly.  She looked out over the street at the people walking around, listened to the sounds of cars going by and distant shouting.  She hugged herself and rested her chin on the rail.

New York. NYADA. Fame and the spotlight.  For as long as she'd been at McKinley, these things had seemed reserved for people other than her.  But she'd really come into her own over the past year as a senior, especially with Mr. Schue more or less handing the glee club over to Finn, who turned out to be a pretty smart and fair club advisor once he stopped trying to literally replace Mr. Schue.  Now the things she'd dreamed of were finally within her reach, and the fact that it all came down to her was pretty terrifying.  If she got into NYADA, it would be because of her talent, her hard work, her dedication, and nothing else.  But if she didn't, it wouldn't be because Rachel Berry had stolen the spotlight or Mr. Schue had overlooked her.  She was starting to understand just how much the spotlight could expose, and thrilled and alarmed her all at once.  She only wished she didn't feel so alone right now.  Everyone was so busy, and so worried about their own futures, so even though she wanted to get a pep talk from Blaine or pick Rachel's brain for performance tips or...release some pent-up energy with Mike, or just talk to him about how nervous she was, she didn't.  

In the end, it all came down to her alone.

***

This prospect was of course more alarming, less thrilling, when [Tina](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mega1zZ66c1qeds6ko1_500.jpg) was standing backstage in a NYADA auditorium the following afternoon, nervously wringing her hands as auditions proceeded.  Carmen Thibideaux was out there, waiting for Tina to walk out onto that stage so she could stare and judge and criticize.  Tina had left early in the morning, not wanting to bother Mike.  She had kissed him on the forehead fondly as he slept, smiling down at his face, which had been sleep-slack and relaxed, not lined with worry and stress.  Long distance had been hard at times over the past year, and Tina was planning on tapping into that for her performance today, reflecting back on those moments when she'd felt left behind, felt like giving up.  But she and Mike had worked hard and overcome those bumps in the road, and soon they would be in New York together, so long as this audition was enough to convince Ms. Thibideaux that Tina belonged at a school like NYADA, that her talent was something worthy of the proper nurturing.  

She hugged her middle, taking a few deep breaths and wiping her sweaty palms on her dress.  She winced when the guy currently auditioning fell flat on an important note, and rather than feeling glad that he had messed up, she only felt more anxious.

"Hey, T."

She whirled around to see [Mike](http://25.media.tumblr.com/5905fda6a284591cb72e5bc57956736c/tumblr_mm82qkI7Si1qeds6ko1_500.jpg) in the door, holding a single pink rose.  Heart jumping to her throat, she rushed over to him and they stepped outside, grinning and staying quiet until the door was shut all the way.

Tina threw her arms around her boyfriend, holding him tight.  "You're here!"

"Of course I am," Mike said, swaying her back and forth, "where else would I be? It's your big audition!"

"You're so stressed out about school; I thought you'd want to use the afternoon to study."

Mike shrugged, smiling shyly.  "I wanted to be here to cheer you on."

Tina sighed and hugged him again, nuzzling into his shoulder.

"How are you feeling? Nervous?"

"Yeah," she told him, nodding against his shoulder, "definitely nervous."

"You're gonna be amazing."

Tina pulled back, nibbling on her lip.  "I hope so.  I mean, I'm no Rachel Berry."  She looked over her shoulder back at the stage door.  Mike hooked her chin and pulled her head around to face him again, kissing her quickly on the lips.

"No, you're not.  You're Tina Cohen-Chang."

The door burst open and a girl rushed out, sobbing.  Tina looked at Mike, her eyes widening, but he just smiled back at her.

"Now go show that NYADA recruiter who that is."

Well, he had succeeded momentarily in distracting her from her nerves, because now she just wanted to burst into tears over how much she loved Mike as she kissed him on the cheek and slipped back inside the auditorium just in time to hear Ms. Thibideaux call her name.  She took a deep breath and walked out on the stage, stopping directly center.  It was hard to see [Ms. Thibideaux](http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120608003111/es-glee/es/images/9/90/Glee32019.jpg) past the glare of the stage lights, and for that, Tina was grateful.

"Hello, my name is Tina, and I'll be singing 'Cosmic Love' by Florence + the Machine."

"Music," was all Ms. Thibideaux said, and seconds later, the [opening notes](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-jgzVHyZd4) met Tina's ears.

" _A falling star fell from your heart and landed in my eyes,_ " she began delicately, " _I screamed aloud as it tore through them, and now, it's left me blind..._ "

When she was still in New Directions, Rachel would often go on and on about her messy romantic relationships, and how heartbreak and yearning were the lifeblood of any respectable artist.  Tina had rolled her eyes at her theatrics like the rest of the girls, but the past year had helped her understand what Rachel meant.  She had struggled on her own, with her boyfriend and most of her friends leaving, feeling lonely and young and behind.

" _...the stars, the moon, they have all been blown out; you left me in the dark..._ "

Tina pushed her hands through her hair, closing her eyes briefly as the intensity of the song grew and grew.

Self-confidence had been an issue for her for a long time, and some of her darkest, most insecure moments had occurred in the last eight or so months, wondering if Mike was growing up while she was stalled, if he was finding new and exciting people - girls - that he'd rather be with than her.  They'd had their miscommunications and their fights; tears had been shed and Tina had more than once felt like she was losing everything that had given her a sense of belonging.

" _I took the stars from my eyes, and then I made a map..._ "

She cast her gaze to the theater balcony, and saw that Mike had snuck in.  He was watching with a soft smile on his face.  She felt her own smile answering his.

" _...I heard your heart beating, you were in the darkness, too.  So I stayed in the darkness with you..._ "

Her performance had been running on the energy nervousness could provide, but now she felt centered, the perfect way to end the song.  She let her body sway to the beat, dipping and twisting as she belted out the chorus twice more.  When she reached the concluding "oohs", she could see Carmen a lot easier, and found that she wasn't so scary after all.  She tilted her head down, feeling and owning the end of the song as best she could, drawing out the performance until the instrumentals faded away completely.  She stood, breathless and exhilerated, and waited for Carmen to speak.

"Thank you, Ms. Cohen-Chang.  I'll see you later for your dramatic reading."

"Thank you," Tina said, smiling brightly, and walked into the wings.

When she found Mike again outside the auditorium, her hands were shaking so much that he laughed and brought them to his lips, kissing both sets of knuckles as he informed her that she'd knocked it out of the park.

And she had.  In the end, it had all came down to her, and no matter what letter came in the mail later on, she knew that she had.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song:
> 
> \- Cosmic Love (Florence + the Machine) by Tina.


	2. Tested

[Rachel](http://cdn.sheknows.com/filter/l/gallery/lea27.jpg) was greedily gulping down an early morning coffee when [Kurt](http://25.media.tumblr.com/05b93e202b72e59393223b609a0ba795/tumblr_mh4gfmk97d1qeds6ko1_500.jpg) emerged from his bedroom, blinking at her sleepily.

"You're already up and leaving?" He whispered.  The two of them were the early risers in the loft, but Rachel had made an extra effort today.  "Rachel, it's only six."

"I know," she told him, keeping her voice low, "but today is my evaluation with Cassandra."  She hurriedly packed her things into her bag.  "I'm going in early.  I need the extra practice time.  I don't want a repeat of last semester's debacle."  Despite being featured as a freshman at NYADA's Winter Showcase, Rachel's embarrassing failure in Cassandra July's dance class had followed her around like a dark cloud.  Sure, no one brought it up at school, but she could tell they were all thinking about it and judging her.  It was time to finally scrub away that awful blemish on her academic career, and she was going to do so by wowing Cassandra and her classmates so much that they'd never speak of the unfortunate past again.

At least that was the plan.

Rachel kissed Kurt on the cheek as he poured himself some coffee and stuffed half a bagel in her mouth.  "Bye," she said around the bread and headed for the door.

"Rachel."  She turned to look back at Kurt.  "You know you're going to do amazing today, right?  You kicked that class's ass this time around."

She smiled and mumbled, "thanks," through her mouthful of bagel.  She wanted to believe him, and a big part of her did agree, but she wasn't going to get ahead of herself again.

***

By the time her classmates started filing into their classroom, [Rachel](http://24.media.tumblr.com/4c6d50d7465deb4d9ea0b97f91e4690d/tumblr_mfrwokN7Q61qiou8so3_250.gif) had had an extra hour and a half to warm up and rehearse her number for her evaluation.  She pressed a hand to her belly; it was filled with butterflies.  She couldn't really tell at the moment if they were butterflies of anticipation or increasing anxiety.  She went to her bag to get a drink of water and heard her phone buzz.  It was a text from Mike.

**Hey Rach, break a leg today :) ur gonna rock it**

Rachel smiled down at the message and typed her thanks.  Mike had been a big help in preparing her final piece.  He was the best dancer she knew, and his confidence in her bolstered her own.  She hastily turned off her phone and shoved it in her bag when she heard Cassandra July's voice announcing her approach.

"...show on the road.  We've all got to sit through what I'm sure will be five passable yet uninspiring final show pieces today, and I've got a bad headache.  Don't make it worse."  [Cassandra](http://media.tumblr.com/18cd87e7586291adb12181974f80b9a4/tumblr_inline_mo24f1LEQ21qz4rgp.png) walked in the classroom and looked around.  Rachel saw several of her peers cringe under her stare, even the ones who weren't schedules for evaluation in today's class.  

"Micah, you're up," she barked, dragging her stool to one corner of the room.  Rachel clutched her hands together and moved with the rest of her classmates to gather around her, leaving the floor open for Micah.

Rachel barely paid attention to Micah's performance, or the one after it.  She stared across the room, unseeing, a buzzing in her ears during the two numbers, silently rehearsing in her own head.  The last time she had devoted so much energy and care to a performance, it was the writing of her original song for Regionals in junior year.  If ever there was a time to get it right, it was now.  She jumped a little when Cassandra said her name but rose gracefully, stepping out of her sweatpants so all she wore was her red leotard.  Taking a deep breath, she placed her CD in the player carefully.  She had picked a song with simple, easy vocals, determined to focus on the improvement of her dance skills and the performance of her body rather than her voice.  She pressed play and hurried to downstage left, hitting her mark as the [music](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kDIB5TB3bDk) started.

Her movements started off small and contained and it helped her relax and find a groove.

" _...what would you say to have your way?  Would you give up or try again, if I hesitate to let you win?_ "

The number was an eclectic fusion of hip hop, jazz, some Fosse-inspired combinations, and contemporary.  Mike had helped her a lot with the choreography, and given her pointers when she struggled the most with the hip hop sections.  Rachel had taken Cassandra's notes from this semester and the previous one, determined to prove that she could embody sexiness and be comfortable with her body as a performer, but also showcase how far she'd come in terms of pure technique.

" _If at first you don't succeed..._ "

She travelled across the room in a series of jumps and spins, then slunk forward, dropping to her knees with a swing of her hair.  She circled her torso and then her hips before sliding into the splits.

" _...you can dust it off and try again..._ "

She could feel the sweat on her brow, her blood pumping as she exerted herself through the routine.  Turns and kicks, arm combos and lunges - it was a hard routine, but she felt strong and full of energy, on a high from the performance.  She looked right at Cassandra (who stared right back), not to be rude, but to show her just what Rachel Berry was made of.

" _...dust yourself off and try again, again, again..._ "

She was pretty sure Mike would be proud of her swagger as the music faded away and she slithered into her final pose.  There was no applause, as usual, but Cassandra tilted her head up and pursed her lips in that way she did when she didn't have anything bad to say.  Rachel beamed and took a little bow before sitting down again.  Cassandra called the next student up to the chopping block and Rachel suppressed what would have been a squeaking noise of delight as she caught her breath and did a little stretching to cool down.  

It was funny how much perspective could change.  Here she was, currently being ignored by her classmates and teacher now that her evaluation was over, sitting on the floor in one of many classrooms on campus, and the rush she felt over her performance was akin to any of her competition solos with New Directions.  She knew she had done well and she knew Cassandra would pass her.  She had earned it and it was the most amazing feeling.

***

The most amazing feeling lasted the rest of the day and into the night, until [Rachel](http://24.media.tumblr.com/5538d9b7bbafd0ce8c140483fbbe648c/tumblr_mip9rkBADs1qeds6ko1_r1_500.jpg) woke up at 2:00 AM and it hit her that she and Blaine still had their final performance for Delaney's musical theatre course.  And Carmen Thibideaux was probably going to be in attendance.  She lay back down against her pillow slowly, playing with her hair to occupy her suddenly fidgety hands.

She hadn't performed in front of Carmen so far as she knew since Freshman Introduction.  It seemed like a lifetime ago that she'd gotten up on the stage and sang 'New York State of Mind', secretly hoping to impress Brody.  Things had gone well this time, but she was sure that on top of Professor Delaney, if Carmen was there, she'd be looking to see improvement since then.  How much, Rachel didn't know.  She did know that Carmen Thibideaux was uncompromising and very critical.  Suddenly, she was very glad to have Blaine as her scene partner, and that she would be looking at him for most of the number.  He always seemed to have a calming influence.

***

Blaine was not calm when [Rachel](http://media.tumblr.com/df3c39f23d7a2f06ddbc0737fdbab668/tumblr_inline_mhnqiqUGMm1qz4rgp.png) woke up again and emerged from her room for breakfast.  

He was usually slept in longer than her and Kurt, but today [he](http://24.media.tumblr.com/c95fd127afa9b2099a4fa37cdca8a782/tumblr_mpp33mAPgO1rd6e8fo1_250.gif) was the first one up and ready, forsaking his usual coffee in favor of tea with honey.

"I thought I detected an itch in my throat," Blaine told Rachel when she asked about the change during breakfast, swallowing heavily several times.  He ended up looking pretty funny, like a bird bobbing his head as he walked.  "Today is not the day for an irritated throat.

"Blaine," [Kurt](http://24.media.tumblr.com/14fb70ce38751904e875cc776f6239a0/tumblr_mmkz1aR09o1qeds6ko1_r1_500.jpg) took his hand, "you and Rachel have this performance down perfectly.  You worked really hard on it."

"Nothing's ever perfect," Blaine told him, eyes wide, "don't even try to argue with me, Kurt.  You're the biggest perfectionist I know."  He turned to Rachel, his free hand coming up to smooth back his perfectly in-place hair.  "Rachel, we went over those staging changes for the second verse, right? Do we need to give it another run through?"

"Maybe we should," Rachel said, putting down her half-finished toast, "in which case, we need to leave right now and hopefully get the auditorium to ourselves before anyone else shows up."  She was suddenly feeling very anxious again.  What was she thinking, sleeping last night, when she could have been rehearsing?  They would just have to make do with hopefully 10 or 15 extra minutes before their class.

"Good idea," Blaine said, jumping up and grabbing his satchel.

"Please tell me you're not going to do your vocal warm up on the train," Kurt called after them as they walked out the door.

"No, of course not," Blaine told him with a weak laugh, at the same time that Rachel said: "Well, we have no other options!" and pulled Blaine out the door.

Blaine did manage to talk Rachel out of doing warm ups on the train.  It seemed that she was taking on his panic for him, and the more nervous she felt, the calmer he seemed to become.  Maybe he was calming down in order to help her from flying off the handle, which was a very Blaine thing to do, and she certainly appreciated it.  However, it wasn't until they'd run through the blocking for their number, warmed up, and changed into their [costumes](http://www.boneaubryanbrown.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/Once082r.jpg) that the butterflies in her stomach settled down a little.  She was sure that if Carmen Thibideaux sat in, they'd be fluttering around madly again.  Kurt sent her a text message telling her to break a leg, which also helped to settle her nerves, and she couldn't help but smile at the sweet look on Blaine's face as he gazed down at his phone, probably reading a message from Kurt as well.

Last class, Rachel had pulled the earliest time slot from a hat, and so she and Blaine were slated to go first.  They waited backstage, Rachel hugging Blaine's arm and Blaine resting his chin on top of her head, until their classmate, acting as Call Boy, gave them their cue.  Taking a deep breath, Rachel walked out onto the stage holding Blaine's hand.  She glanced out towards the audience and her breath caught in her throat at the sight of [Carmen](http://images.wikia.com/glee/fr/images/c/cd/Whoopi-goldberh-dans-la-peau-de-carmen-tibideaux.jpg) in the front row.  Blaine swung Rachel around and pulled her close to him, adopting their opening pose.  "Hey, we're good," he whispered in her ear, "we're Guy and Girl now, right?" Rachel gave a tiny nod, centering herself as the [music](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8YyiOJi9mHc) started and Blaine led them in a rotation, like a slow dance.

Blaine pulled away and turned to face stage right as he started to sing.  " _I don't know you but I want you all the more for that..._ "

Rachel joined him in a harmony, turning to face stage left, sinking into her role.  " _Words fall through me, always fool me, and I can't react..._ "

When they hit the chorus, they looked at each other.  Girl looked at Guy, her true love.  Rachel let the feeling wash over and out of her, letting it be true to her but more than her as well.

" _...you have suffered enough, and warred with yourself; it's time that you won_ ," she sang, and she and Blaine rushed towards each other, clasping hands.

She forgot Carmen was there.  She knew she had an audience; she could feel them feeling and responding to the story she and Blaine were telling, but her worries about impressing Ms. Thibideaux vanished.  There was no room for them in her, not while she was so filled with Girl's yearning and desire.  She and Blaine pulled apart again, singing out to the auditorium.

" _...raise your hopeful voice, you have a choice; you've made it known!_ "

They reunited once more: Blaine crossed to her side, taking her hand gently, and they walked to center stage as they crooned out the last lines, eyes on each other.  " _Falling slowly, sing your melody, I'll sing along..._ "

It was only when she heard applause and Blaine's hand, already on her cheek for their end tableau, was knuckling away a tear that had slipped from her eye.  Blinking rapidly, Rachel let out a huge breath as she and Blaine took their bows.  Heart racing, Rachel looked out into the audience.  Carmen was speaking with Professor Delaney quietly.  Rachel felt Blaine's hand squeeze her own, and she squeezed back.  

Carmen looked up at them and nodded, a small smile on her lips.

"That was wonderful, you two," Delaney called, and Rachel felt herself sag a little in sheer relief.

As soon as they were offstage, Blaine and Rachel threw themselves into a hug, doing a little happy dance.  

"We finished out first year, Blaine!" Rachel squealed in excitement, though she kept her voice to a whisper.

"That was incredible," Blaine whispered back happily, "I can't wait to do that for the rest of my life."

Rachel knew she wouldn't stay quiet much longer, so she and Blaine grabbed their street clothes and left the auditorium to go change.  

Yes, the rest of her life.  Blaine was exactly right.  She was meant to spend the rest of her life on the stage.  She had always known it, and always known she'd do whatever it took to get there and stay there.  This year, she had really been tested on that issue.

She smiled at Blaine as they headed back to the auditorium to join their classmates.

She was pretty sure she had passed.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs:
> 
> -Try Again (Aaliyah) by Rachel.  
> -Falling Slowly (Once) by Blaine and Rachel.


	3. You'll Never Forget Her Name

"...so I ended up getting Finn and Ms. Pillsbury to help with painting the banners because Ms. Pillsbury really didn't want me to miss my tutoring session," [Brittany](http://media.tumblr.com/1957a8081eb18437c80c56c58b5730c4/tumblr_inline_mp189toy9E1qz4rgp.png) said happily, smiling at [Santana](http://25.media.tumblr.com/906b60ddb41f5ea693dd72990c8c3d20/tumblr_mhj0nitb6i1rn2txlo1_500.jpg) through her computer screen, "way less work for me, and Ms. Pillsbury looked like a colorful beekeeper, she was so covered up when we were working with the paints. Finn ended up getting paint all over himself, but he was pretty good at designs for posters."

Santana grinned at her, resting her chin in her palm.  "When are the oblivious po-dunks at McKinley going to realize you're a manipulative genius?"

"I learned from the best.  Speaking of manipulation, did you manage to dig up any dirt on the people in the jazz choir at your school?"

"No," Santana said, gnawing on the side of her cheek with a glance at her calendar on the wall.  Her audition was tomorrow afternoon, and she'd never felt like this before, not when she auditioned for West Side Story, not even when she opened her letter from NYU last spring.  "I decided blackmailing them into letting me join their group probably wasn't the best way to start things off.  I'll keep it in my back pocket in case of emergency."  She winked at Brittany.

"You can always make sure they know you're not joining to spy on them and bring them down from the inside," Brittany said, nodding seriously, "and that way, there won't be as many tests of loyalty."

"Tests of loyalty?" 

"I had five for every member of my student council."

"You have the best ideas sometimes.  But it'll be fine.  I'm gonna nail my audition and leave them all begging for more, and if they actually consider for a second not letting me into their nerdest of a club...well, I wouldn't want to hang out with idiots with such bad taste anyway."  Santana flipped her hair over her shoulder, frowning slightly.

"You're being a baby bird," Brittany said, and Santana looked at her for a minute before smiling.  It was a thing Brittany called her when she was acting a lot more confident than she felt.  ("You're pretending you've flown a million times and you get mad if anyone tries to give you pointers, but really you haven't left the nest ever before and you're afraid your wings won't work at all and you'll fall to a grisly death and the worms will be eating you instead of the other way around.")

"Okay, fine, I'm a little nervous."  Brittany looked at her pointedly.  "More than a little.  I just...feel like I've been drifting this year.  I don't know what I would have done if it wasn't for Rachel and Kurt and Blaine - not that I'm about to tell them that.  I really feel like being able to sing and perform on the regular again would feel good."

"Can you sing and dance around the courtroom when you're a lawyer?"

Santana laughed.  "I'm sure it's been done."

"Well," Brittany said slowly, sitting up a little, "I know that I can dance right here in my bedroom."

"Believe me, I remember," Santana said, her voice a purr.

"I was thinking maybe I should do that right now," Brittany continued on with a predatory smile stretching across her face, "you know, to give you inspiration for your audition.  Do you think it would help?"

"You've always been good at inspiring me," Santana said, pressing her tongue against the edge of her teeth and sliding down against her pillows as she watched Brittany grin and select a [song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjaSMyPcA08) before she slowly crawled away from her laptop on her bed.

Heat twisted in Santana's belly at the way Brittany arched her back and looked at her through the screen.  Her hand trailed down her throat and over her chest.  It didn't look like she was going to sleep any time soon.

Especially when she saw Brittany hadn't bothered with any pants.

***

The following afternoon, [Santana](http://24.media.tumblr.com/70d4cea360ceb4aa06484d886deaa995/tumblr_mhvzkqT6UT1qcyv1eo3_250.gif) waited outside the Jazz Choir's choir room, trying to tune out the person currently auditioning and completely killing Fly Me to the Moon.  She reminded herself that Blaine and Rachel had told her such an obvious choice for an audition piece would never stand out.

Her phone buzzed and she looked at a new text from Brittany.

**if their mean 2U dont 4get lord tubbington has connections in the nyc mafia! love u xoxo**

The door opened and [Christa and Justin](http://cdn03.cdnwp.celebuzz.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/20/20/preview-8-580x435.jpg) came out, smiling.

"Okay, Santana, you're up," Justin said, giving her a preemptive thumbs-up.

"Break a leg!" Christa said, and Santana wondered if she might mean it literally.  She knew competition when she saw it, no matter how friendly.  Rachel always blinked innocently and smiled wide right when she was about to jump on Santana in a bid to get the use of the bathroom ahead of her.

And she never won.

She took her place in the middle of the room, squaring her shoulders as Justin introduced her.

"You guys remember Santana, right?  She and her friends jammed with us back in October."

Her vision was kind of blurry but she thought she saw people nodding and a couple waved at her.  She raised her hand absently, trying to refrain from snapping to just start the music already.

"Okay, Santana, the floor is yours.  Tell us a bit about yourself and we'll queue up the music for your song."

She had to talk first?  Shit.

"I'm Santana.  I moved to New York last fall from an ass-backwards little town in Ohio.  And even though I love this city, Lima is where I discovered that I'm really passionate about performing." She smiled slyly. "And I'm awesome at it.  I think I sort of forgot about that this year, but I'm starting to remember."

Santana turned to the pianist with a nod of her head, and began to sing.

_"[She's just a girl and she's on fire, hotter than a fantasy, lonely like a highway...](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Y-2N47U6F8)"_

This song was her.  She'd felt an immediate connection to it the first time she'd ever heard it.  It was the perfect choice, because she wanted to show herself in all her glory.  It was perfect for her voice, perfect for her attitude...and perfect for how she was feeling in this moment.

_"...so bright, she can burn your eyes; better look the other way..."_

Because as she sank into the song, her nerves dissolved, her worries about finding a place where she could fit in at NYU went away, and all that remained was her and the song and remembering what it was to stand out in the best way possible.

_"...she's on top of the world, hottest of the hottest girls, say..."_

She spread her hands out, one wrist hovering over the other in front of her stomach, her eyes shutting as she belted out the chorus a second time.

_"...everybody stares as she goes by..."_

She scanned the faces of the members of the jazz choir, taking in their smiles and stunned expressions and it just fueled her confidence.  This felt so right; it felt like home.  It felt like fighting over the remote with Blaine on Wednesday nights, or letting Kurt style her hair before a night out, or riling up Rachel just for fun.  It almost felt like curling up in Brittany's arms after a long day.

_"...nobody knows that she's a lonely girl, and it's a lonely world, but she gon' let it burn, baby, burn, baby..."_

She had missed her girlfriend, her best friend, so much over the past months.  No amount of new friends or less-lame-than-she-thought room mates could change that.   And though she put on a brave face, long distance sucked.  But they were making it through together, and in the mean time, she'd discovered she really could take on the world by herself.

_"This girl is on fire!"_

She slapped her hands on her hips to stop their shaking and grinned at the applause that followed the end of the song.  Then she took a bow with a flourish that would've made Kurt proud.

***

"To Santana on her successful audition for Jazz Choir!" [Blaine](http://media.tumblr.com/e78b6dc4a0953903c9ab0d407b2639f4/tumblr_inline_mjjnfo4BDI1qz4rgp.png) said, raising his glass of wine.  Three others clinked against his.

"And!" [Rachel](http://25.media.tumblr.com/d4aee45209acdad94e215bd32f129dae/tumblr_mnxylqWMD31qeds6ko1_500.jpg) said before anyone could take a sip. "To Blaine, for being the perfect Guy to my Girl and doing amazing in all his classes this semester and finishing his first year at NYADA!"

She looked around at her room mates, who were all assembled on the floor in their apartment, pointedly and [Kurt](http://25.media.tumblr.com/733489d4e6ad71e9d81e765067290db8/tumblr_mspqvwpeXn1qgrxsfo3_r2_250.gif) rolled his eyes.

"To Rachel," he said indulgently, tilting his glass in her direction, "for being generally fabulous, making it through her first year of NYADA with nearly all dignity still intact, and for passing Crazy July's dance class with flying colors, so she'll never have to deal with that woman again."

"Aww," Rachel said, leaning her head on his shoulder.

An awkward moment of silence followed.

"Okay, can we just drink now?" Kurt said with another roll of his eyes.  "I know I don't have any accomplishments to toast at the moment."

Santana laughed.  "To Kurt," she said, "for helping me put together this outfit so I could look like even more of a badass than I usually do for my audition."

"And for that tofurkey burger you made me last week," Rachel added.

Blaine smiled.  "And for what you did for me last night."

"Oh, gross. TMI, Anderson," Santana teased.

"What? I meant when Kurt gave me this amazing massage -"

"That right? Did you have a cramp in your thigh?" Santana asked sweetly.  Blaine and Kurt both blushed.

"Oh, don't act like we couldn't all hear you moaning over very loud music while we were trying to sleep, Santana," Rachel said, pointing an accusing finger at her.

Santana smirked at her.  "It's alright if it turned you on, Berry.  I know it's been like a year since you got laid."

Rachel grabbed a pillow off the couch and tried to hit her with it, but Santana just dodged and finally took a sip of her wine, laughing against the glass.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs:
> 
> \- Girl on Fire (Alicia Keys) by Santana. Let it be known I planned this out long before we found out Santana would be singing this on the show!

**Author's Note:**

> Song Order: Cosmic Love, Try Again, Falling Slowly, Girl On Fire


End file.
